Blog entries tagged 'A Little Humor'

School's Out!

Laura Douglass

lots of turns, twists, and Twinkies - I went from the surreal life to real life in my thirties, and now sit on the threshold of the big 4-0. Perhaps it's because Darling Hubby and I stretched that youthful glow out to ridiculous lengths, like a dwindling string of Silly Putty, that we now take such joy in reliving all the pleasures of childhood with our brood: especially the school countdown.

Not that those hardworking teachers weren't feeding that frenzy each day by X'ing off [...]

Just how much is a tooth worth, anyhow?

Laura Douglass

e lunchbox- carrying, Ugh - I'm going to make her a feminist if it kills me - daughter.

For a chick who spends three mornings a week beating the stuffing out of punching bags and passionately enjoys throwing back a well-crafted brew, I know that someone up there must have had a great sense of humor when they sent me down this little angel to raise.

We're like a cartoon team, Tough and Fluff.

With seventeen months more experience at life [...]

Biscuit, such a tranquil name

Laura Douglass

carpet - a real plus for the maid. Yes, that means Mom.

Now there were no big surprises as our new pup negotiated territory and her place in the pecking order against the stone-cold killer cat that also shares our domicile. A quick study, Biscuit is wary of those well-armed swipes of pure evil.

In true testament to her manic species, Milkshake can purr contentedly, bat her bedroom eyes, and draw blood - all at the same time. Worse, like a spider, she'll draw in unsuspecting vict [...]

Sleep is Overated!

Rollie

o manage and that I would finally get the well deserved rest I needed. But once again, I was wrong. It seems that as they get bigger so do all the things I have to do, from homework to laundry to extra-curricular activities. Now, I find that from the time my feet hit the floor at 6:30 am (Okay 6:45 because I hit the snooze), I'm running around like a mad woman until I crawl back in bed each night close to mid-night. So much for getting my recommended 8 hours of sleep! And unlike the good ole [...]

People To Meet in Moore County

Dan Askins

poverty. We met through the Moore County Leadership Institute (MCLI) when he was a banker with First Bank. Charlie is one of those guys that you want to have around if you're ever in a burning building. He's not particularly assertive or physically imposing, but if he said, "Follow me," you would. He has such a quiet strength and calm demeanor. Both traits are polar opposites of myself, which is probably why I like him. Charlie has always been the guy I go to for business advic [...]

Year without Guilt

Rollie

mom who was slightly overweight, frazzled and usually sleep deprived. What I soon realized was that I was a "normal" mom and the "perfect" mom for my family with all of my quirks and flaws.

As a result of this new found realization, I gave up reading parenting books and comparing myself to other moms. I stopped trying to find ways to be the "best" and accepted "good enough". What I have learned is that even those "perfect" moms have their [...]

Shaving Legs & Other Re-deployment Rituals

Rollie

ng. You see, military spouses work incredibly hard to create the illusion of having everything under control while their husbands are away. I'm not saying we don't have it all together but we do run things a little bit differently when our men are across the ocean.

If fact, I think I run a pretty tight ship when he's gone. The bills get paid, the kids are fed and the house is still standing when he returns. In my book that is success. Granted we eat a lot more Mac-n-cheese whe [...]

Christmas innocence, tinsel & lingerie

Laura Douglass

icked side and I couldn't resist asking if she thought we should send out a similar card.

"Oh no, Mommy, you can't do that! She's showing her belly button," protested my wise little angel.

Ah, the blessing of celebrating another December in the company of such innocence. There is simply no substitute for kids when sharing the joys of tree-trimming, present wrapping, or better yet unwrapping, and all the other little pieces and parts that makes each Christmas sea [...]

The Christmas Burglar?!

Dan Askins

The other night, about 1:30 AM, I heard a loud crash and breaking glass. I jumped up, ran into the hallway and yelled out in my deepest, baddest voice, "WHO'S THERE!!". I was also carrying my weapon with me. I looked down, and I was holding onto my pillow in a very menacing way. I hate it for the fool who dares endure the wrath of the pillow. Turns out my Christmas tree had fallen over, and a few of the ornaments broke in the process, but I now know what I would do in a fight. : [...]

Perils of getting away for a week

Laura Douglass

;s not like we're fleeing a hurricane and have to pack up our most precious belongings for a trip of indeterminate length. I mean really, I'm leaving the comfort of home for the comfort of a Disney hotel room: not exactly roughing it!

Though I guess in everything, one can always look back on this trip or that one when a little better planning could've saved the day.

Darling hubby and I had our own Donner Party-vacation moment during our honeymoon. While planning this roma [...]

Balloons, Candles & Slot Cars!

Laura Douglass

says birthday like a massive fire engine terrifying the neighbors and crushing your landscaped driveway plantings.

As my children have reached each successive milestone, I have attempted to provide equally amazing thrills and chills. We've rescued stuffed animals from peril in the yard, blown up mountainous bouquets of pink balloons, and laid acres of train track throughout the house.

In my defense, I do eschew the glitzy store-bought cakes in favor of much simpler Mommy-made far [...]

Halloween and Power Tools

Rollie

re. So after cleaning out the pumpkins and making a mess of guts and seeds all over the garage, they bailed on me to go ride their scooters.

My sister and I were left with four pumpkins to carve. We decided to start on the largest two which turned out be too thick for our store bought carving tools. After a little cursing (on my part) and elbow grease, we finished them without any kids in sight to marvel at our beautiful creations. At this point [...]

Feeling the powerful pull of the pigskin

Laura Douglass

y of their games. But I did read all about it.

Here in the Douglass encampment I have been following any and all news of Brian Leonard: the youthful running back for the St. Louis Rams. Leonard hails from the same thriving upstate New York metropolis, Gouverneur, population 7,000 [not including cows], that my darling hubby calls home.

Along with the denizens of this tiny slice of American dairy land, we have cheered Leonard's every success: in high school, college, and now the NF [...]

Cooking with gas - Glad it's a guy thing

Laura Douglass

tives saturate stacked charcoal briquettes with enough lighter fluid to send flames shooting skyward like fireworks, blackening the leafy canopy of less fortunately positioned trees. Or maybe it's because despite the many safety features installed on our own silver monster, my dear husband still managed to singe our son's eyebrows off one day as our erstwhile tot stood to close while Daddy used the self-ignite button.

No doubt about it, grilling falls within the masculine sphere of [...]

Silly putty punctures parental pretensions

Laura Douglass

g this vibrant, writhing sea of people and vehicles, each city scene was overwhelming in its chaos. At times, it reminded me of the streets of my former domicile, Washington, D.C. on a Fourth of July holiday. Dupont Circle in particular was always a steaming cauldron of taxis, pedestrians, road rage, and poor municipal planning.

Of course, Karachi notwithstanding, this is a serious film dealing with tragic circumstances involving the lives of two outstanding journalists.

Daniel Pea [...]

A birthday with no rain!

Laura Douglass

inst nurture.

As for Mother Nature's lack of appreciation for my big day, I am utterly disappointed.

As a child, I hated the guarantee that a late July afternoon squall would sabotage my annual soiree.

When we moved to the Middle East, my parents tried to sell me on the idea by promising a desert-dry cake and candles day. Yes, you know what I'm going to say - it still rained. And no, watching our Iranian neighbors celebrate this unexpected life-giving blessing did not [...]

The beginning of a new year

Laura Douglass

that sprout up in the stores. Like seeds in a freshly planted field, the rows of lined paper pads, pens, and highlighter markers speak of patience: waiting to yield their harvest in creativity, not fruit.

Not one to be swayed by seasonal marketing, I cringe aghast at the premature display of Valentine's candy the first week in January and the springtime sandals and swimsuits in chilly December. Surely the worst offense is found each Autumn, when the fake firs of Christmas share aisle s [...]

Surviving Family Picture Day

Rollie

sions in which I have gotten lucky, that has not been the norm.

So why would I think today would be any different? I don't know. I guess deep within my subconscious I've always dreamed of having a "Norman Rockwell" family photo. I know this is incredibly ridiculously and utterly unachievable given the personalities of our family, but a girl can dream - right?

Today was picture day and it has been filled with the same chaos that exists every time I try to rally [...]

A New Chapter in Parenthood!

Rollie

our house, by ourselves for more than a few hours never mind an entire night. So, what do you do when the kids are gone and the house belongs to you again.....

If you're us, you probably spend a little time looking at each other trying to figure out whether you stay in or head out. At first we thought about going to dinner or a movie, but we ended up vetoing waiting to be seated or hanging out at the cinema with someone else's kids. This left us with Option 2 -&nbs [...]